Category Archives: Relationships

A Vacation in Michigan

Posted on 24 July 2009 | Leave a comment

This next week I am going to be in Michigan with my best friend’s family. Merideth and I are more like sisters than we are friends, so I am sure we will get into at least one fight. With that aside, I am excited because we get to go to Mackinac Island and I have never been there before, so this will be a whole new experience, and I am interested to see how things work without cars. I have heard stories, but I finally get to see it with my own eyes. I will get to run around the lake, so that should be fun, too. I mean, not to mention the swimming, softball, trivial pursuit, cards, and s’mores! Whoo-hoo!

I am supposed to be packing right now, but I think I am going to write here, then couch surf for a minute, then run. I also have to sew some things today. I don’t like packing because it means I have to go away, but it has to be done. Eight days is a long time to be gone. I have never been gone for more than six or (rarely) seven days at stretch, which is enough time to leave Bec struggling with all the pets by herself. I think she likes her alone-time, though, so it is a good trade-off. Pets and alone-time. I suppose when I get back she will have done some home improvement like she usually does.

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Posted in Relationships, Running, Swimming

A Great Weekend. And a Self-Discovery.

Posted on 21 July 2009 | 2 comments

This past weekend was one of the best I have had in a long time. On Saturday, Bec and I drove to Cincinnati to have lunch with Tim, who was in town because Whitney was in a wedding in Oxford, OH. We went to B-Dubs and Tim and I each had mango-habanero and Caribbean jerk wings. They have boosted to spiciness of their sauce since the last time I was there, and my nose ran constantly as I smiled my way through all six, very hot mango-habanero boneless wings. It was a good last meat hurrah before I stop eating meat again tomorrow. I am still going to eat milk, but meat and eggs are history until I finish my dissertation. The challenge will be getting enough protein to keep running and to start swimming. I think I can do it if tofu is involved and if I use Will’s homemade seitan recipe.

On Saturday night, we went to Sarah and Daniel’s going away party. Andrea was unsure of herself as a hostess, but everything was fabulous, including the delicious Jimmy John’s subs and the cake. I had fun, reminisced about the past few years, and ate way too much…

which was okay because on Sunday, Bec and I started the day by walking the dogs, as we always do. Then we went on a 30-mile bike ride, which was more like 28 miles, but who is counting anyway. We rode from our house down the Cardinal Greenway to Blountsville. It took us about two and a half hours, but we did it and had a blast! We had great conversation and remembered how beautiful the trail is out in the country, winding through trees and past farms.We decided that before the summer is over, we are going to ride our bikes to Losantville to have pizza at the Pizza Shack. Riding back with full bellies will be the challenge!

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Yesterday, I realized how non-compassionate I can be. So much so that I don’t really listen to the people around me. I hear them, but I don’t really hear them. I don’t take the time to listen to their pain. I have become so wrapped up in my own things this summer—comps, home improvements, my assistantship, etc.—I am not listening to people like I want—or need—to listen to them. I talk and write so much about being compassionate and being a listener that I don’t give myself the space to actually do it. I know this didn’t just start this summer, but it has taken this summer to help me recognize that I talk far more than I listen, and most of what I say is not part of any productive good. I find myself talking to hear myself talk, or to have the best story, or prove I am right, or to make people like me, or to spread things that I only hear half-way, or to complain about things that are out of my control. I really want to change this about myself, but it is so difficult.

Why do I do this? Good question. I am listening if you have any answers or any suggestions about how to tame the tongue.

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Posted in Food, Grace, Relationships

Prays. Runs. Drinks Cucumber Tea.

Posted on 10 July 2009 | 2 comments

I think about prayer on a regular basis, and mostly I think that it is something I do not do frequently enough. However, this morning I had an insightful conversation with my friend Molly. Molly and I have been getting together for about three years, after meeting through a sweet spiritual moment at Starbucks, to volunteer at the mission once a month and to watch Rob Bell‘s Nooma videos. We don’t watch the videos as frequently as either one of us would like, but when we do, it is always good and thoughtful conversation always follows.

Today we watched “Open,” which is about prayer. In “Open,” Bell seeks to answer the questions we all have about prayer: why does it seem to work sometimes and not others; does God really hear our prayers; why pray if it doesn’t always work; how does prayer effect our lives; and, how is our life impacted by the prayers of others. While I was watching this particular video, two things crossed my mind. First, my friend Kelly can usually sense when I need prayer, and I can usually sense when she is praying for me. Second, Molly and I were just talking about prayer the last time we worked at the mission. Of course, Bell addresses both things, but you will have to watch it yourself to get his take on things.

Frequently, I have some of these same questions/doubts. Does God hear my prayers? What if I pray for the wrong things? Do my prayers really change the God’s plan? Does prayer change me or the world? What if God doesn’t answer the way I want? What if God makes a miraclehappen? Does God still make miracles? How am I the answer to some of my prayers? How can I hear God? Is that God I hear or my own voice in my head? Why pray at all? Yeah, I doubt a lot. But, I do take it to heart when James writes that the prayer of the righteous person is powerful and effective.

I had no idea this video would impact me the way it did. I usually like Noomas, but I find that much of what Bell says are things that I have thought about and already agree with. I would love to just sit down and have a chat with him because we have so many theological ideas in common. With that said, this video hit me more powerfully than most of the others have. I realized that my life is supposed to be one constant prayer, something that I have contemplated prior to today both here and in my daily life. Hearing someone else outline how that works, using Jesus’ prayers in the Garden of Gethsemane, though, really helped me to realize that we are all a part of the same creation. My prayer/life touches your, which touches hers, which touches his, which touches mine, and on and on. We are one in spirit, one in love, and one in prayer. This is why Jesus is finally obedient even unto death: he is part of the long fabric of prayer.

Molly and I then discussed this great article that she read in Runner’s World about a woman who runs marathons. When the writer of the article runs a marathon, she wears a bracelet that lists 26 of her friends or acquaintances who are struggling with something. For each mile she picks one friend on the list, then thinks about/prays for each friend. I think this is fabulous, and I pray as I run, or bike, or swim. I always have; it helps to pass the time, and it helps me to think about various friends and their families. I tend to be a bit more organic in my prayers, allowing my mind to wander from one person to the next, but the bracelet is a great idea. I would probably stay more focused in my prayers instead of trying to solve the minute problems of the day before me.

Speaking of running. I jogged–I jog; I don’t yet run–about two and a half miles today. I am still doing that thing where you run a couple of minutes and then walk, which is kind of annoying but necessary. I envision myself running miles and miles, though, which should be worth something. Once I lose a few pounds, I should be able to step it up and actually run and run for a good distance. That extra girth really holds a person back! My goal is to be able to run the five mile Turkey Trot in Dayton on Thanksgiving. Without walking and at a respectable time. I am signing up for a 5K run in middle September, so we will see if I can add two more miles on by the end of November. It’s sort of a craps-shoot.

Yesterday for an early birthday present my mom bought a new pair of running shoes for me. I walked in them last night and they are a nice fit on my short, wide feet. They are ASICS (Anima Sana In Corpore Sano, which means a sound mind in a sound body). I am my father’s daughter. When he used to run all the time, he swore by Asics. As do I. They are the only shoes that consistently fit my feet. Here are my new shoes, which they now have stopped making:

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This morning after the jog, I tried some of the new tea I bought (I should say my mom bought) at Target yesterday: White Cucumber Tea by Tazo. The tea was interesting. I put a bit of honey in it because I was afraid of the taste, but tomorrow I will just drink it plain. The flavor is like a tea-version of a Mojito. It has lime, lemon, peppermint, cucumber, and white tea. I am sure there are other ingredients, but those are the predominant flavors that come through. And, it is decaf, which is nice. I also had some blueberries, yogurt, and wheat germ after the jog. Stoneyfield Farm makes an excellent organic vanilla yogurt that is perfect with berries of all kinds or bananas, but it is sort of thick, which might gross some people out. This concoction tasted a bit odd with cucumber tea, though.

cucumberwhite

Find this tea. Drink it. Be at peace.

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Posted in Fat, Food, Relationships, Religion, Running

Two Year Old Parties. Greek Church. Running.

Posted on 29 June 2009 | 2 comments

This weekend was full of excitement and nostalgia. Friday got it off to a bang with a practice test for the comps, workshopping with Sarah and Elizabeth, and a dinner with reading at Kellie’s. The vegetarian jambalaya was fantastic!

On Saturday, we went to Izzy’s second birthday party, which was a celebration of all the things she loves: balls, Dora and Diego, rubber-duckies, shoes, and pizza!

We bought her a game that goes with the book The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle. I read the book out loud to some of the people at the party. I know they loved it despite their protests when I started to read it for a second time. We also bought her a million (exaggeration) little rubber toys for the tub. Ducks. Fish. Frogs. They all spit water from their little puckered mouths. And, we got her a football, small enough to fit her hands, but big enough to really throw. She got a bunch of other stuff from other people.

Her presents from my brother and from Alex were the best; they got her pink high-top Chucks and a little, ruffly sun dress, respectively. Who knew boys could shop so well for little girls. I think it may be because both of them secretly want children of their own! They both deserve the best in life, so I know they will find it. I have never met two more amazing single guys! She also got a HUGE rubber-ducky from some other friends. It was pretty sweet except it was a little creepy because it looks like it is staring at you no matter where you point its head. I would still love it if I was Iz.

Back to the party. We ate lots of pizza. I ate mostly cheese pizza. And, we broke a piñata that was shaped like a shoe. Of course, Abs made the best cakes: Dora with a waterfall and mountains, a baseball, rubber-ducky cupcakes, and shoe-shaped cookies. I got a bit of a sugar overload as I over0indulged. Since I haven’t been eating much sugar lately, I think it made me pretty sick, but it was good cake!

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On Sunday, my family and I went to Holy Apostles Greek Orthodox Church in Indianapolis. The priest, Fr. Dean, who spoke reminded me of the priest in South Bend when I was little. He was fun, funny, relevant, and poignant. He reminded the Greeks who are founding this parish that they needed to work hard to get it started, but he also reminded them that their work is sanctified. He, like the last priest that spoke, was from Detroit. I can say that if I lived in Detroit, I would have my choice of parishes to attend, not like here in Muncie, where I have to drive to Indy to go to the Orthodox Church.

My uncle asked me if I was ready to be baptized in the Orthodox faith. I didn’t have to think about it. I am ready.

He said, “I would be your god-father,” which is funny coming from an older, completely bald guy who isn’t much taller than I am.

“Of course,” I said, “who else would I ask? Of course, I want you to be my god-father!”

He beamed. To put this in perspective, Reader, I should ask if you have ever seen The Princess Bride. You know the little bald guy, who is friends with Andre the Giant? That is my Uncle George, complete with the lisp. He will be my god-father.

My questions about this are: 1) Do I have to take classes? 2) Do I get to choose my own baptismal name? 3) Do I have to kiss the priest’s hand when I take communion? 4) What are the differences between Orthodox and other theologies? 5) How does this all work? I have so many questions because I don’t want to sign up for something I don’t believe in simply because I am ethnically Greek.

I love the way the Greek church smells. The incense is a pleasing fragrance to the Lord, I am sure. In the small, bare chapel where Holy Apostles has its services, I can transport myself back to the beginning of the Christian centuries and imagine myself worshipping with the early believers. With all of the sacramentalism and ritual, I picture Peter and Paul attempting to meld together their Jewish heritage with this new covenant, and trying to work the Eucharist into their already established Jewish customs.

What results is a seemingly over-the-top representation of Christ to the people, which can, at times, be a little off-putting. However, with the liturgy taking place in such a small, archaic chapel with wooden pews and only two icons in the room, I can imagine how Peter and Paul wrestled with retaining the liturgy and their Jewish customs while transferring their new beliefs to everyday people.

The ceremony which initially seems to be too ornate and ostentatious is, in fact, the way the Word is related through the body of the priest to the body of God’s Church. The priest relates the Christian story in the same way each and every Sunday; the only things that change are the Biblical readings for week, working slowly through the entire Judeo-Christian story. Through the multiple kyrie eleisons and Lord, have mercys, I learn my salvation again and again. Isn’t that the point of church?

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Today, I got up and walked the dogs, then I continued my new running program. It is going quite well. Hopefully, by the time school starts, I will be ready to run a 5K and not die halfway through. My goal is to run a 5K road race sometime in September or October. I hope to run a mini-marathon by next spring or early summer, then sometime around my next birthday (when I will turn 36), I would like to run a full-length marathon. I hope it happens. I really want to say I ran a marathon before I turn 40. That is really my goal. I hope it happens. I have no unrealistic expectations. If it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen.

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Now it is 1PM, and I have to study. This week is Early American literature, better than the Renaissance, but not as good as what is coming. I seem to prefer literature after the 1700s, the rest is just background!

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Posted in Food, Grace, Reading, Relationships, Religion, Running, School, Writing

What I Should Be Doing vs. What I Do

Posted on 23 June 2009 | 1 comment

I should be studying for my exams.

I should be writing for my workshop group.

I should be doing what I know I need to be doing.

Instead I am fretting over all of it and making no kind of headway on actually getting it done.

Every time I go to the bathroom, Ordinary Genius looks at me from the tub-rim. I leaf through it and put it down.

When I come into the bed room, stacks of Norton anthologies stare me down from their place on the bookshelf. I spend less time with them than I should. They don’t let me forget.

I go for walks. I peel paint. I pull up carpet. I wish I had time to go through everything once and for all.

I wish I could donate my life to the Goodwill. Maybe some one else could figure out how to use it more effectively. They would recycle it. They would be glad to have all this stuff, all this pressure, all these worldly things.

I just want a Volkswagon Van or a big old truck with a cap, Bec, my dogs, my bathing suit, some overflowing dumpsters with lots of good food, and the beach. That is all I tell myself I need.

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Really, I am pretty happy right now. I just hit these little bumps in the road where I think I need to be doing something different than what I am doing. Talking with Sarah this morning helped me keep my career choice in perspective, because I am doing what I love: reading and writing. And, I am doing it with other people who also love it, and I am teaching it. Hopefully, I even influence some of my students to love it, too. What could be more fulfilling than that? I just need to figure out how to escape to the beach once a year to restore my soul…

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Posted in Gleaning, Grace, Relationships, Religion, Writing