Category Archives: Teaching

Getting My Poop in a Pile, So to Speak

I have spent the better portion of today in the bowels of Bracken Library, sorting out syllabi and preparing for the first week of my newest endeavor. I am really excited about my children’s literature classes, and I hope my students will love the class as much as I have loved putting it together. My hopes are that we will all benefit from our journey together and that we will all come out on the other side with a greater appreciation of literature and of each other. It seems like the class is going to be quite a bit of work for both my students and myself, and the key will be not to get behind.

The new scheduling device on my cell phone will help with time management because I have scheduled everything in and given alarms to each activity. At the very least, I will feel guilty for not doing what I am supposed to do at the right times, and I shouldn’t miss appointments like I did last semester. We’ll see how it goes. My office mate says my cell phone is fascist. I tend to agree. I may not listen to the alarms just to spite it, to stick it to the Verizon Wireless Man. I still call Deer Creek by its proper name for the same reason, sticking it to the man.

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I just signed up for a life-guarding class in March. I am more nervous about it than I ever am about teaching. I haven’t done any of those skills since 1999 or 2000. Wow. I haven’t used my life-guarding skills for ten years. I just made myself feel old, as in the age of rocks or dirt or air. Signing up for a class in which I have to wear a bathing suit and be groped by other people is a bit daunting as well. I am always embarrassed of my size. In my head, I know I can run farther than some of the people who will be in the class, and I can certainly swim farther than many of them. But, there is this element of fear at being stared at, picked last, shunned as a partner because of my pudge. Trust me, life-guarding class is always weird and there are bound to be several skinny, little bitches who only want to get good tans and sit in a chair in a bathing suit all summer long.

During the class, I will be in the middle of training for the Indy Mini, too, which means I will have to rearrange my running schedule to accommodate the weird-ass hours of the class. We meet on March 19-21 and 26-28 (Fridays, 6-10PM; Saturdays and Sundays 8AM-2PM). Swimmers are such freaks. I am hoping that by this time next school year, I will be fast enough at swimming to join the Master’s Swim Club at BSU, but I need to shed a few pounds (30-50 is my goal) before that happens. Although, I am unsure if I can stand the rigorousness of their practice and meet schedules. Maybe the swimming and running can help me accomplish doing it, but we will see. I suppose I should actually try eating healthy, too.

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Last night Bec and I tried to go to Puerto Vallarta for dinner, but there were no parking spaces, so we drove over to Victor’s Gyros, Pancakes, and Ribs. Yes, you read that properly: Gyros, Pancakes, and Ribs. An odd combination, I thought to myself. We started with the combination platter for an appetizer—mushrooms, onion rings, and cheese sticks (all fried and oh, so healthy)—and I had chocolate chip pancakes while Bec chose the gyros, as I knew she would. Bec enjoyed her gyros platter, which came with an insane amount of food: gyros meat, a pita, feta, onions, tomatoes, rice, vegetables, french fries, and tzaziki sauce. My chocolate chip pancakes came with chocolate chip pancakes. They were sprinkled with powdered sugar, but I was fine with that because they were pretty doggone tasty.

I enjoyed the place more for the atmosphere than the food. It has a greasy spoon sort of diner-y feel, with waitresses who argue over tips and a hostess—maybe owner-ish sort of person, but at the very least super tight with Victor—who constantly told the wait staff to be quiet and to wash and sanitize their hands several times throughout our meal. One waitress protested that she had just washed hers, so blondy, the hostess, said, “Go, do it again,” as she flitted her hands in front of herself like distasteful birds. If I worked there, I would kick her in the trachea.

As a customer, though, you have to love a place that will work a high school student, our waitress, for more than nine hours without a break, simply because she doesn’t smoke. And who wouldn’t want to go to a diner where more than once you could hear one of the seedy attitudinal waitresses say, “I swear on my three kids ….” You can fill in the blank with whatever you think she might have been swearing about. Once it was her credit card tips. I felt right at home, honestly. It reminded me a great deal of working at Pizza King and to a lesser degree, Starbucks. On some levels, it even reminded me of the English department as each waitress jostled for favor with the man I assume was Victor.

I will go there occasionally to write. simply because of the entertainment value.

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I am thankful for seedy, greasy spoon diners and for the people who work in them.

Exercise: walked the dogs

Food: banana, orange juice, chocolate milk, Pure bar, salad, Feng Shui rice chips, sloppy-jane (veggie sloppy-joe), spinach, chocolate milk, oat muffin

Homemade Caramel Corn.

I just ate too much of it. Now I wish I would’ve kept the Chicago style, so I could have had some cheddar to go with it. 😦 I am such an idiot. I was trying to be good, though, and not eat myself into oblivion. I failed.

Found this great quote: “I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.” Of course, it is from Lily Tomlin as Edith Ann. I hope I can be one of those teachers. They were always my favorites. Yes, I get that it is about teaching content and standards, but it is also about being human and real with your students so they leave with much more to think about than simply the subject matter.

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Food: Twizzlers, decaf Americano, Heath Klondike, sushi, miso soup, squash, mashed potatoes, peas, caramel corn

Exercise: walked the dogs

One Syllabus Knocked Out. One to Go.

I got one syllabus/schedule knocked out today, and the second one is getting the same treatment tomorrow. On Monday, I will present Debbie with my completed draft, which thrills my soul and probably hers, too. No doubt she will be excited to know I am not a complete fuck-up. Though, I am sure there will be multiple revisions required. It’s hard to believe, but this break is actually going to be productive! Wahoo.

My brother and I had a good time running together this morning. Since I have been sick for about a week and because it was FREEZING outside, we only ran two miles. Then we went to Starbucks and had some drinks. When we walked in, my cousin who just got out of the psych ward was there having coffee and stealing movies with their “free” Internet. I said hi to him, but I think he is on heavy doses of some mind-altering drug, because all he said back was an almost inaudible, “Hey.” Weird.

Tomorrow, I am going to Anderson to take Adam to get new tires on his car. To say thanks, he is taking me to have sushi for lunch. I am picking him up at Midas at 8AM, then while he is coaching diving, I am going to sit at his house working on my last syllabus. I must admit that I am nervous about this one, because I have never taught this class before and because the syllabi and schedules I have looked at seem so much more complicated than what I am used to making. Is it necessary to list everything you plan to do in a class period on the schedule? Is it wrong to believe that the schedule should merely be a list of what is due that day? Things to contemplate by tomorrow night. My goal is to finish the syllabus before I go to bed.

David and June are here. We had dinner and now they are playing Rock Band while Bec reads (EDIT: sleeps) and I finish some of my projects and write a bit right here. I am trying desperately to get my calendar squared away for the spring semester, but I will have to wait to completely finish it until I finish my other syllabus.

Last night, we rang in the new year with the Combers. Good times. Even the slightly special, too tired to play properly, Trivial Pursuit and the jacked-up MadLibs were good times. We were so tired that we left before we gave our resolutions, which I usually break within a couple of weeks anyway. My New Year’s resolution is to stop procrastinating like I do. I really didn’t procrastinate like this until graduate school, and I am trying hard to figure out how I can change back into my productive, over-achieving self. Somehow I have morphed from a competitive, perfectionist into a slacker who waits until the last minute to do everything.

How did I become who I am today? I think it started in seminary when I was working full time (for a bit, two jobs) and taking 15 credit hours of graduate classes every semester. I think I just got into the habit of doing everything when I could and that turned into doing it when it was due, which then became completing everything as it has to be turned in. It’s not healthy, though; I swear.

But, I digress; as usual, we ate too many nachos. Sean Lovelace would argue that you can never eat too many nachos. I heartily disagree. Too many nachos can be had. In fact, they were. Last night.

This is all I have left to do from my huge long list at the beginning of the break:

  • Write my ENG 204 syllabus.
  • Send my ordination information to Las Vegas for Rachel’s wedding.
  • Scan in my students’ comics so they can have them back.
  • Finish my dissertation proposal and submit a copy to Debbie before she returns from (Georgia?).

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I am thankful for strange adult children invading my house. 🙂

Food: banana, decaf caramel macchiato, blueberry scone, Christmas goodies, grapefruit, apple, cheese, wheat spaghetti with mushrooms, tofu, basil, and parmesan cheese, salad, strawberry ice cream

Exercise: run two miles

Mostly Finished. Running.

I get to pick up my running again on Tuesday. I can say that I genuinely miss it when I don’t do it. And, I have been sick, so this has been a perfect time to not have enough time to run anyway.

I sat in my office for hours this weekend working on my grades. I was here all day yesterday, stopping only for lunch (Pita Pit) and dinner (Bella Avanti). I also consumed too many chocolates and cookies and one divine pear, which I will write more about later when I can describe it without it sounding like a sexual tryst instead of consuming a piece of fruit. I need some space from that succulent moment like I need space from steamy encounters with beautiful people who will remain nameless.

I graded all day today, too. I didn’t stop for anything, eating my lunch (cheese, almonds, an apple, and a clementine) in my office. I graded up until right now. I am leaving this place, the walls of which are becoming more like a swiftly closing coffin than a warm comforting professional space, and moving the party to my friends’ house where I am house sitting tonight. I vow to watch at least one movie after finishing the comments for my students’ memoirs and before falling asleep.

With any luck, Bec will come visit me before she falls asleep on our couch. If she doesn’t, I don’t blame her. She is probably worn out from all the excitement she’s had today.

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I am thankful for finishing semesters. I feel like I have really accomplished something each time it happens.

Exercise: just riding my bike from place to place

Food: listed above

Almost Back Among the Living

Well, as you may have noticed, I haven’t written anything for a while. My absence has been caused predominantly by my over-zealous scheduling and lack of early completion of projects. I can honestly say, though, that I am improving on this front. I have merely had more to do this semester than I usually do because of teaching at Burris and teaching two classes in the Writing Program. I really haven’t procrastinated as much as usual, at all. I am pretty pleased that I am left with only fifty portfolios, twenty-five memoirs, and twenty-five finals to grade. All of these have been turned in this week, so I couldn’t have graded them any sooner.

My to do list over break includes (in no certain order):

  • Rewrite my American Literature syllabus.
  • Write my ENG 204 syllabus.
  • Send my ordination information to Las Vegas for Rachel’s wedding.
  • Scan in my students’ comics so they can have them back.
  • Finish my dissertation proposal and submit a copy to Debbie before she returns from (Georgia?).
  • Meet with several old youth group members for lunch/coffee (Dec. 21, Dec. 29, January 2?).
  • Watch Comber cats, Mix-Berg cat, Weiss cats, and my own animals.
  • Take Elizabeth to train station (Dec. 23rd) and pick her up (Jan. 6).
  • Spend some time with Amy on the 26th & 27th.
  • Turn in my grades by 10AM on Monday, work at the mission at 9AM on Monday.
  • Spend Christmas Eve with the Combers!
  • Spend Christmas with family!
  • Celebrate Izzy’s half birthday and her baptism anniversary.
  • Run the Inaugural Running in Circles for Fun at Minnetrista on New Year’s Day.

This should be an interesting break. The two things I must accomplish: dissertation proposal completion and 204 syllabus creation. I will also return to writing here everyday, running, and recording my food. It’s been a weird week or so.

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Exercise: walked the dogs, walked from Burris to RB to Lafollette and home

Food: Snickers bar, tea, muffin, tea, sugar cookie, chocolate cupcake, spinach artichoke ravioli, salad, bread

I am thankful for not getting sick earlier in the semester, and I am thankful for exaggeration.