Last Day Before the Long Haul

Today is my last day of freedom before the long haul to Spring Break. Sometimes I am sure you think, She hates her job. I don’t hate it; in fact, I love my job. What I don’t love is the 8 to 4 regularity of it. I don’t love being in the same room for five hours, teaching similar things for those five hours. I also don’t love grading. Not one little bit. I love the look on a student’s face when she finally understands what we’re talking about. I love the letter from parents telling you that you are making a difference in their child’s life. And, I love the way you feel at the end of the day, like you’ve just helped 113 students get a little bit smarter. About English. About themselves. About the world. About life.

I told my mom yesterday that I am pretty sure I need to pastor a church. I would love it if the Methodist Church would just get rid of their ridiculous homophobia and ordain GLBT pastors. I’d be the first in line to sign up for candidacy, but I can’t live the lie that is what the Methodists expect of their queer pastors. I need to pastor because I love talking with people about God’s love, I love hearing about what people are going through, I love trying to work with people to reach a common solution. The facet of pastoring that’s freeing is that you don’t have to put values on people. And, actually, you are specifically called not to put values on people, unless you are helping them to see how God has so much more for them in their lives than what they are currently experiencing. I think I mean that you are called to help people see their shortcomings, but also to help people see how God is already there waiting for them, to make them more perfect. I love this quote from Rob Bell: “A fresh new word has been spoken about you and you are actually pulled into a better future.” That’s what I want to bring to people. You aren’t who you were; you’re in the process of becoming.

As far as wishing that the Methodists would change, I suppose I can poop in one hand, and wish in the other and which do you think will fill up first?

2 responses to “Last Day Before the Long Haul

  1. unfinishedportraitofsam


    out of curiosity, what do you think are the chances that the UMC’s policy on ordaining GLBT pastors? i suppose that’s a question i should be asking my dad, too…

  2. The future looks really bleak. If anything, they are backlashing against it, because the Episcopalians have had so many problems. 😦 I think it’s mostly out of ignorance and fear. Most UMC churches who have openly GLBT pastors will fight to keep them. Apparently, the gays are good at nurturing. Who knew?

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