How Did I Let This Happen . . . AGAIN?!

This time last year I had just finished the Muncie 70.3 Half Ironman, and I weighed 190 pounds.

This time this year, I just finished a 3.3 mile walk that felt like a Half Ironman, and I weigh 240 pounds.

In November of 2011 when I changed my diet to paleo for the first time, I felt so good I swore I’d never stop it. But I did; in fact, I sort of reversed it, making up for all the time I’d lost for eating bread and other things that aren’t so good for me. Then in November of 2013 when I got plantar fasciitis in my left foot, I stopped running. Then in May 2014 when I hurt my knee running at the Mounds, I stopped running again.

In the process I made myself back into a woman who takes an hour to walk 3 miles and who weighs 240 pounds.

Here I am again. Right back where I didn’t want to be. Super fat and not so sassy.

I’m hurt by and angry with and disappointed in no one but myself. What now? I do what I do when I am faced with the consequences of my own bad decisions: I give myself grace.

Here I am today, July 17 at 240 pounds and way out of shape:

Mug Shot Side View

Mug Shot Front View

Here is the route I walked today.

They say that whatever you’re doing, whatever your fitness and diet patterns are, whatever is important for you, and whatever your mind set is on your 40th birthday are all good indicators of how you’ll live out the rest of your life. My 40th birthday is next Tuesday, and I want to live well.

Here’s to a successful recovery. Again.

4 responses to “How Did I Let This Happen . . . AGAIN?!

  1. We live, we learn. I mean, if we keep living long enough, we will eventually learn whatever it is we are supposed to be learning. I’m so happy to see you know how to love yourself, Corby. That is the most important lesson. The rest will come so much easier because of that. We are still in this Paleo-ish thing together–let me know if need me!

  2. juliewood3

    It sounds like we are each facing battles and paths unplanned. We need to focus on God’s plan for us which is to travel through this valley and reach the mountain top again. So here we go. There is more than running to regain your inner peace. You are a great swimmer and biker. Jump in and Hop on and let’s go.

  3. Thanks, Julie! Your post was very inspiring this morning… I’m planning a bike ride this afternoon, and I am looking for somewhere cheap to swim!

  4. You’re right, too. We got this.

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