For most of my life, as you’ve read countless times here, I make goals, promise commitment and then fail. Not this, my friends, not this time. I am renewing my New Year’s resolutions right now for one more month. If I go month by month, will I have greater success?
I have these goals, and I’ll be damned if I won’t succeed. I have quit Twitter and Facebook in favor of writing and sketching. I have signed up for Racine 70.3 and the Medtronic Marathon (Big Shoulders comes next month), and I have mapped out my training. I have committed to a mostly paleo diet, and with the exception of a few moments of weakness (like the pancakes this morning and the ice cream on Thursday), I have succeeded. I am teaching Bible as Literature, so I am carefully reading along with my students. I have re-read some classic texts, and I am reading some new ones now. I’m making it happen.
So why, then, am I so stressed out? I’m wound up tight, and I can’t figure out why. Is it the moving stress? Is it job-related stress? Is it friends? Enemies (I don’t think I have any of those)? Is it the feelings of pressure or of helplessness in the face of some perceived adversity? Is it because the weight isn’t just falling off this time around? I’m 40, I shouldn’t expect it to, right? I’m not sure, but since I have some of the other things under wraps, I’m going to focus this week on maintaining the workout schedule, and adding in meditation. Contemplation. Just thinking about thinking.
There is this: Primal Living.
I already miss you, Shaman. Still, I understand and support you. Praying for your inner peace.
I miss me, too, which is why I am here instead of there.